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Monday, August 29, 2011

Unidentified Eighties Object

Saw this on the counter as I was leaving the gym.  I think it's some sort of weapon or perhaps an antiquated interrogation tool.  Does anyone recognize this thing?


Sunday, August 28, 2011

Jimmy v. Irene

Last night, amidst the backdrop of Hurricane Irene's utterly anti-climactic performance, the first-ever Buffettpalooza 2011 raged on.  We celebrated the man, the myth, the legend into the early morning hours with Jimmy's music, margaritas, friends, and fun.  And lots of beer pong.  LOTS.  We reminisced about good times seeing JB in years past and how we hope to relive those experiences--at another venue than the uberoppressive Jiffy Lube Live--at some point in the future.  And then we played more beer pong.

Highlights included:
-My buddy and I huddled together in front of the grill under a large, hot pink Victoria's Secret umbrella, determined to get our BBQ on no matter what mother nature had in store.
-Awesome beer pong action by yours truly (well, in truth, my first and last games were absolute crap.  But you know how it is...ya hit that sweet spot and you're golden for, like, 2 hours.  Yeah college.).
-The Buttsplosion (see video below).
-Lil' Jimmy (our concert-going fake rooster mascot) totally got wasted and puked in the dryer.

See the BUFFETTPALOOZA 2011 Album HERE!!

Footage of fallout much worse than wussy Irene:


And, now, a few pics from the album: (these are relatively tame...but I assure you, debauchery was had by all)






Friday, August 26, 2011

Guess you can't reason with hurricane season after all...

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(news from Margaritaville.com)
 
08.26.2011
Jimmy Buffett concert at Jiffy Lube Live on August 27th has been postponed to Thursday, September 1st
(August 26) – Bristow VA - Due to the predicted impact of Hurricane Irene and forcasted high sustained winds and heavy rain for the DC Metro area, Live Nation is announcing the postponement of the Jimmy Buffett & The Coral Reefer Band concert scheduled for Saturday August 27th at Jiffy Lube Live. The concert has been rescheduled to take place on Thursday, September 1st. All tickets purchased for the postponed concert will be honored on the new date.
***************************
 
But, guess what, ParrotheadsBUFFETTPALOOZA lives on!  Might hamper the backyard bbq aspect of the bash, but we'll be rockin' and rollin', listening to Buffett, and drinking margs all night long, baby!!  You bettah believe it!!
 
For your viewing pleasure:
 
 

Thursday, August 25, 2011

Libations, HOOOOOO!!

Seriously, if you aren't rockin' Cocktail 45 by now, you're livin' small.  Join the "now," man!  Tonight's menu consisted of New Amsterdam martinis, gin'n'tonics, Manhattans, and a new freak creation called The Felsen (ingredients upon request).  LOVE me some Cocktail 45!

PS - want to join?  Guess what?  You're already invited.  Make it happen, Cap'n!

Monday, August 22, 2011

Face what? Book? Facebook? What's that?

FROBlog's on Facebook!! (wow, JFro, welcome to five years ago...mazel tov.).  Check out the new page HERE

LIKE IT....it'll be your good deed for the day.  And you'll be a better person.  And I'll buy you a beer.*


*all beers will be bought at Kate's Place in Wilkes-Barre, PA when they're serving dollar Labatts.  Which, to my knowledge, is every night.  But I'm only buying when I'm there.

Sunday, August 21, 2011

Steel Pulse - Tight Rope

This song is just too good not to post.  Just can't keep me down!


Friday, August 19, 2011

Let's Hug It Out, Boss.


Seriously...who wants a hug?
Today is National Hug Your Boss Day.  I'm not sure who invented this...special? day, but I'm gonna place bets that it wasn't a boss.  I mean, while office mates are often friends, public displays of affection are typically frowned upon in the workplace.  After all, a hug isn't just a simple handshake/highfive/fistbump... hugging is some serious bodily interaction.  I mean, we're talkin' chest-to-chest friction here, people--that's an intimate maneuver often reserved for family, close friends, those with whom you just shared a traumatic experience, and the occasional stripper.  This whole concept is just asking for trouble...and, more importantly, extreme awkwardness.

I've grouped the people who will hug their boss today into the following categories and included their RAL (Relative Awkward Level, 1-100) Score--see where you fit in:

A) The Overenthusiastic Hugger -- This is the employee who is really excited about NHYBD (National Hug Your Boss Day).  I mean...really excited.  Like, they were the first one to remind you about NHYBD...last week.  They'll jump on the boss first chance they get, taking the boss off-guard and forcing them to immediately assess the situation, let out a "Whoa!" with an uncomfortable, acquiescing laugh, and hug back politely.  RAL: 72

B) The Reluctant Hugger -- You know who this person is.  The timid guy/gal.  The one who buries themselves in their cubicle and only emerges to answer nature's call and at closing time.  They don't "get" when the boss is being sarcastic in telling them they'll need to come in on Saturday AND Sunday until it is later explained to them.  The Reluctant Hugger wants to hug the boss, but is afraid.  They will, upon learning of NHYBD, approach the boss as if they were about to enter the Octagon with a drunk and disgruntled Ken Shamrock, extend their arms slightly, and raise their shoulders/eyebrows in question just enough to warrant the boss walking over and returning the hug.  Very unnatural.  RAL: 49

C) The Joking-and-later-Regretful Hugger -- my personal favorite.  This involves the office clown; the guy who's always cracking--and usually laughing at--his own jokes (and, yes, more often than not, this one will be a guy).  This joker is the king of the famous "handshake invite retraction surprise" whereby one extends his arm for a handshake and then, when the subject reaches out, he whips his open hand up to the side of his head and goes, "HaHO! GOTcha!" and stands there grinning like an ass for 10 minutes.  Upon learning of NHYBD, he loudly announces, "Hey, it's National Hug Your Boss Day!!" and jokingly feigns giving the boss a hug..only be caught off guard by the boss (also, typically, in this situation, a man) who proceeds to lock the J.A.L.R. Hugger in a big ol' smelly manwich (usually accompanied by a hearty man-laugh, an audible "grrrrr," and transfer of shirt sweat).  At this point, the joker, visibly mortified that he's nipple jousting with his boss, begins to deeply regret his decision and is left standing there with a look of incredulity on his face as the rest of the office retreats back to their desk, equally traumatized.  RAL: 88

D) The Spiteful Hugger -- perhaps the least awkward of the hugging scenarios, but not unworthy of a mention.  This is the hugger who doesn't particularly like the boss, but wants to ensure their success in the company and, therefore, goes along with the boss' whims, wearing a phony smirk on their face and muttering insults behind the boss' back.  They consider themselves vastly-underpaid and are pretty sure they could do the boss' job better than the boss.  The Spiteful Hugger will go hug the boss...but they won't like it, damn it!  And they'll hug extra long and hard, too, just so the boss KNOWS they're the best hugger in the office and they should definitely get that raise come their next review.  In fact, in hugging so thoroughly, the Spiteful Hugger won't realize they've hugged for too long and the boss has already released his/her arms and relaxed their muscles, ready to move on.  By the time the Spiteful Hugger realizes they've overclung, it's already too late.  Awkward Turtle, anyone?  RAL: 35

Ladies and gentlemen, if there's one take-away from this post, it is this: FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, ABSTAIN FROM HUGGING YOUR BOSS.  It'll save you and everyone around you an unnecessarily awkward moment.  If you need that kind of discomfort in your life, do what my brother did and watch Borat with your elderly, conservative, foreign-born grandparents.  But, on this National Hug Your Boss Day and all that come after, do the right thing: keep your subordinate hands to yourself!

Monday, August 15, 2011

Sunday, August 14, 2011

Bismillah, NO!

Pop quiz, hotshot: you're driving down the road and Bohemian Rhapsody comes on the radio...what do you do?

Tape yourself lip-syncing it, of course.  Duh.


Friday, August 12, 2011

In one nostril and out the other

I was noticeably congested at work this week and a colleague suggested I go out and buy a Neti Pot.  "What's a neddypahd?" I asked, having never before heard of...well...whatever it was she just said that I thought I misheard or was a word in another language.  WELL, my friends, for those of you who, like me, were Neti Pot-noobs up until this point, a Neti Pot is a mini-watering can you use to pour a warm saline solution into your schnoz.  It filters through your nasal cavity and pours out the nostril not in-use, all the while loosening up anything that's standing in the way of you breathing clearly.  It's like a nasal enema.

I decided I'd video review my first Neti Pot experience for all those out there who are thinking of trying it...and probably won't now having heard me refer to it as a nasal enema.  Actually watching it done is a little gross--ok, not for me, but for normal people, perhaps--but if you're curious as to how this thing works, please enjoy below!


Thursday, August 11, 2011

DJANGO!

DAMN he is the MAN!!  I could listen to this all day long.  If you don't know who the great Django Reinhardt is, get thee to a Wikipedia!  Check out this vid for a sample of his genius:

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Aww...c'mon, Anominimous!

Man, JUST when you think you know someone...

Anonymous, better known as "that group that tries to bring down Scientology while wearing cool Guy Fawkes masks...and by the way, V for Vendetta was a good movie...haters...," is threatening to target and kill a small social media site of which you may have heard: Facebook.  The hacktivist group has a handful of E-takedowns to its name and plans to launch their Zuckerbergian assault on Nov. 5, 2011.  Click HERE FOR THE FULL STORY thanks to our good friends at HuffPost.


C'mon, Anons, can't we all just get along??  It's one thing to try to stop a group of Xenu-worshipping, Thetanophobes from assimilating all life on earth and beyond...but it's another to mess with my Wall!!  If I wake up on Nov. 5 and can't post a status message to 400 friends I haven't talked to, directly, in years, I will SERIOUSLY consider renewing my membership to the Tom Cruise fan club...just sayin'...


Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Zombie 5K??!!

Amazing.  Anyone else in?  C'mon...an obstacle course throughout which you're chased by brain-eating zombies??  There's no other answer but "yes."

http://runforyourlives.com/info/how-it-works/